Today I had a brand new experience. Today I experienced what it felt like to feel victimised on the basis of my sexuality. I wouldn’t mind if I had actually been doing anything against anyone else on the basis of theirs but the reality was I was just going about my day to day work.
I was interrupted during serving a customer by a man complaining about the subject heading on one of the shelves. I did not have a problem with his complaint, and I have actually changed the title of the shelf to something more politically correct. What has got my panties in a bunch was the way in which he approached me initially and the fact that he considered himself to be some kind of special snowflake whose opinions have to be dealt with immediately.
He was offended by the word “queer”. I can see why it would offend so I changed it to LBGT. Fine. The fact that I didn’t just dump the customer I was dealing with do it immediately unleashed a whole attitude problem which seemed to suggest that I, and actually everyone that has ever gone into the shop and not complained are all rampantly homophobic. FFS! After being sat on that shelf for over 5 years another 2 minutes is not going to make much difference is it? It is not going to leap down and knife an unsuspecting GLBT person in the neck!! In actual fact his assertion that it was “rude, offensive and makes assumptions” I can accept; except of course that the way he chose to raise this was rude, offensive and made assumptions. Here is what I wish I’d said (but couldn’t):
Rude – interrupting another person in the middle of a transaction just to meet your own (actually rather non-pressing needs) is rude. No one ever died of being offended. You were not bleeding from an artery, giving birth, or having a heart attack. You could have waited but No! You were being selfish, obnoxious and rude and the fact that I insisted on completing the transaction was obviously seen as my diminishing your bruised feelings or somehow implying that your sexuality was unimportant. Actually it is. Your sexuality is of no more interest to me than the mating cycle of a gnat. I was simply being polite to both the customer and yourself, and I was doing the job I am paid to do.
Making assumptions – you assumed that I was responsible for the sign, which I wasn’t. You assumed I was straight and that I was going to give you a hard time, which I am but I didn’t. You assumed that I was a complete an utter homophobe. Which I’m not. You also assumed that I would have to consider your needs above everyone else’s and I didn’t. My bad.
Offensive – I find the assumption that as a straight women I am inherently anti-gay offensive especially since I spent most of my adolescence being either told I was a lesbian, or tortured and teased on account of my own brother being gay. Of course you don’t actually know anything at all about me apart from your assumptions. Isn’t that what you were kind of complaining about here?
The thing is sunshine, I was talking about gay rights before you were even swimming in your dad’s ball sack, certainly long before the best part of your intellectual DNA ended up as a stain on your mother’s mattress.
And actually it is people like YOU not me that cause a lot of problems: the more you go around acting like you should be a special case merely because of what you do with your genitalia the more people, gay and straight or otherwise inclined, you are going to piss off.
You know what I can be offended and so can you, because nothing will happen. Except maybe I will get it off my chest with a ranty blog.
So to be clear, unless there is a lack of consent, it involves kids or animals I have got no problem with where you put your dick. Or what anyone else does with their genitalia. The only genitalia I have interest in are my own, and maybe my husband’s if his luck is in. Other than that I don’t care, not interested. It’s dull.
You have issues my friend, deal with them and don’t project them onto the rest of the world.